How I Re-write: Example

‘Book of secrets’ first paragraph rewritten:

A shocking revelation- Diana had predicted her own death. Diana was aware that there was a plot, and that there were people set out to end her life. The gruelling account of Diana and her boyfriend, Dodi Al-Fayed, is about to unfold.

The original paragraph:

If you were not already aware, Princess Diana had predicted her own death. She knew about the plot to murder her in a car accident. The story of Princess Diana and her boyfriend Dodi Al-Fayed is about to unfold.

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